From the age of 7, my life was unconventional. While on a road trip in Las Vegas with my mother, 2 sisters, aunt, newborn nephew, grandmother, and cousin, my grandmother fell asleep at the wheel. This caused a horrific car accident. My mother, older sister, and nephew did not survive. I would learn this after waking up on Mother’s Day. Shortly after the funerals, I was kidnapped by my birth father. He took me to California and I suffered years of abuse. I remember being punched in the face because he thought I lied about calling him. Once, my orange flavored chicken was also flavored with my own blood because he found me wearing my dead sister’s ring. The woman in the apartment below us often heard me crying out to God for help. When I was alone, I would sing songs that my mom used to play. One day, his mother pushed me out of a window because my birth father finally admitted he was going to kill me. After walking for what seemed like hours, the next thing I remember is the plane ride to Las Vegas to move in with my grandmother. I had hope for a better life. I had no idea I would endure years of a different type of abuse.
By the time I was 21, I had fled the state of Washington to get away from an abusive husband. With me was a toddler I had with an abuse ex-boyfriend who was close to 9 years my senior. I eventually ran back to Washington because a new ex-boyfriend was proving to be the craziest of them all. Life continuously kicked me in the teeth. I drank a bottle a day to myself and smoked a ridiculous amount of marijuana. There was a longing in my heart that I couldn’t explain or dance away with a weekend of partying. I had poor relationship skills, poor coping skills, no knowledge of how to progress in the world, and a support team of one.
There was one person who consistently showed me love and kindness. One lovely old lady by the name of Zella. She lived most of her days in California and was the sweetest thing. Having already lived a full life by the time I was born, my grandmother’s older sister loved to travel, pick fruit, garden, sew, and do word puzzles. She was the first person to ever believe in me. Sadly, I did not know the immense impact she had on my life until I was 23. Zella’s health was declining and she could no longer live alone. Most of her possessions were sold and she moved in with my grandmother. When I finally left my husband, my daughter and I moved in with my grandmother too. Zella and I spent two years reminiscing on our days when all we did was pick berries and watch soap operas. I painted her nails and helped her with daily activities. We did word searches together and comforted each other often. All these years later, my grandmother hadn’t evolved much as a person. Her home was hostile for everyone who lived there. For months, I begged Zella to move to Georgia with me or even into an apartment with 24 -hour care. Each time she refused and I eventually moved away. It was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made. Ultimately, I decided I had to try to live a healthy lifestyle if my daughter and I would ever escape the chaotic cycle that had become our lives.
My journey started with changing the way I think. After spending over 20 years in chaos, my mentality was very negative. I learned intentional meditation. I wrote lists and made dream boards. I convinced myself I could have any life I wanted and I planned every detail of it. For the first couple of years, there wasn’t any significant change. I felt a little better, but chaos still seemed to find a way into my life. Then I learned about quantum mechanics. I started pushing myself even harder to be positive in every way and practice a new set of values. I have spent the past few years really working on myself.Books like How to Win Friends and Influence People and Laws of Attraction became my guides. Today, I am a mother of an amazing young girl. I am a writer, a student, a teacher, and a bit of a wanderer. I help teach kids with difficulties and I’m COO of two companies. I still experience tough times, but I’m truly happy with my life. I never would have imagined being able to have the joy I now live with. I hope to inspire others in ways that lead them to achieve their hearts desires. We all deserve to live our best lives. Join me on my journey to success.